{"id":19585,"date":"2013-03-15T06:00:41","date_gmt":"2013-03-15T10:00:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/socialmediaexp.wpengine.com\/?p=19585"},"modified":"2013-03-14T14:29:08","modified_gmt":"2013-03-14T18:29:08","slug":"social-media-is-as-worthless-as-the-telephone","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/socialmediaexplorer.com\/social-media-marketing\/social-media-is-as-worthless-as-the-telephone\/","title":{"rendered":"Social Media is as Worthless as the Telephone"},"content":{"rendered":"

Welcome one and all to the world premiere of the Theater of the Absurd<\/strong><\/em>, the soon-to-be-infamous TOTA. Please take your seats.<\/p>\n

We’re very excited to bring you our first program, “Social Media is as Worthless as the Telephone.” We had the\u00a0privilege\u00a0(the\u00a0playwright asked us to say that) to discuss the inspiration for this script with Barry, who is known not for his contributions to modern theater, but for writing marketing communications, websites, \u00a0blog posts, and various forms of online content. Whether it was passion, frustration or simply one too many espressos, Mr. Feldman was extremely animated when he explained the genesis of his one-act play came from having read close to 1,000,000 articles about C-level executives’ disregard for social media.<\/p>\n

Many continue deeming social media as trivial. A shocking population of executives, business owners, and even marketing professionals maintain a cavalier attitude standing\u00a0adamantly by the position social media has low or no value for marketing and sales. All too often, even those that have plugged into Twitter, Facebook, Google+, YouTube and the like, are prone to pull the proverbial plug\u00a0in the early stages. They cite\u00a0minuscule\u00a0ROI. They deny a 140-character quip will ever get the cash register to ring. And, of course, they continuously attach social media to the\u00a0prepubescents\u00a0demographic who lack any real spending power. Some would actually LOL if: (1) they knew what the common text abbreviation meant and (2) you were to tell them social media is how people engage with one another today.<\/p>\n

Our story takes place in the chief executive’s office at a business enterprise. Please silence your mobile phones<\/em>.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nHave a seat Marty. It\u2019s good to see you. Would you like a scotch?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nScotch sir? It\u2019s 9 o\u2019clock in the morning.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nRight, right. It is early. Just want you to be comfortable. Would you prefer a beer?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nIf it\u2019s okay with you sir, coffee would be just great.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nSuit yourself buckwheat. And please, call me John.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nYes sir. Er, Mr. President.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nJohn. Call me John.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nYes, yes, John.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nSo what have you got for me Marty? Connie mentioned you sent me a memo. I never get to the damn things, but she said you wanted to show me something you thought would be useful for the business. Is that right?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nYes sssssrrrr\u2014yes, John. Let me get right to it. I know you\u2019re busy.
\n(Reaches into his case and sets his device on the president\u2019s desk.)<\/em>
\nThis is it. It\u2019s called a telephone.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nI\u2019m listening.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nGreat. Well John, the telephone is really ingenious. With it, you can communicate with people, anybody, any where. They don\u2019t need to be in the same room. Each user has a number, so you simply press the buttons and if they\u2019re there, they pick up this part, the handset, and you can hear each other talk.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nWell I\u2019ll be damned. That\u2019s very clever. What will they think of next?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nOnly time will tell. I suspect there could come a time when you might be able to record the conversations, speak with more than one person at a time. You never know. Maybe someday a pocket-sized version will allow you to take it with you.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nPocket-sized!? Why that’s very funny Marty. Maybe someday it’ll give you directions to a nearby bar. No, I got it: you’ll be able to watch football games with the damn thing.
\n(John laughs his ass off. Marty shrinks.)<\/em>
\nSo tell me son, how would this help us grow the business? It seems like a distraction to me. I would think you\u2019d use the thing, uh, what did you say it was called?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nIt\u2019s called a telephone.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nRight, right, right. Catchy name. So what I was saying is if you had one of these telephone machines, you might talk to your friends, your family\u2026 You know what I mean son? How would you get any work done?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nGreat question Marty. My theory is while it\u2019s true you could talk on the telephone with your friends, here at Innovation Global Enterprises, we could use it to talk to our customers and our partners. We could build relationships.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nI think your heart\u2019s in the right place John, but I guess I\u2019m the president of this taco stand for a reason. We don\u2019t want to build relationships. We have a business to run. Priorities. You understand.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nExcellent point sir, but if you don\u2019t mind me saying so, I think if we built relationships by having conversations with people and sharing ideas, we would in turn, build our business. The people we spoke to might even call their friends and tell them about what we make.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nI like you John. You might be a little green and na\u00efve in the ways of business, but you dream big. Those are some interesting ideas you have about communications, even if they are a little, er, how should I say…? Whacked.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nSir, I think I might have that beer now.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nThat\u2019s my boy. Here you go. Try this one. They call it \u201cLite.\u201d Seems to weigh just as much as any other 12-ounce can, but they say it tastes great and it\u2019s less filling.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nThank you sir, John. So could I ask you to consider what I\u2019ve said here today?<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nI must have missed something. Tell me again why we\u2019d want our people using this fancy machine to talk to customers?<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nLots of reasons. They might have questions we can answer for them. If they were having problems with the products, we could tell them how to solve them.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nYou want the company to answer questions and solve our customers\u2019 problems? We have products to make and we must sell them. I\u2019m not running a charity here son.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nYes, sir, but I was thinking if we could be the company people trusted as a resource for information and advice, they might buy even more of our products.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nIt\u2019s a very nice thought Marty. It’s admirable how you young ‘uns like to embrace all the abstract ideas about community and love and all that touchy, feely shit. It really is. Will there be anything else John? I have the advertising agency coming in very soon. They said they wanted to talk about some box that has channels people can turn on to watch people talk and tell jokes.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nRight, right. They\u2019re probably talking about the television.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nTelevision! Right! I think that was it. Telephone. Television. I don\u2019t know how anybody can keep up with all these tele-things.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nWell, things do tend to change very fast in media. People want to share their experiences.
\n(Marty gets up to leave.)<\/em>
\nI\u2019ll get out of your hair now sir.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nMarty, I\u2019m a fair guy. And you know, I wouldn\u2019t have got to where I am today if I wasn\u2019t open to new things and new ideas. You kids coming out of college sure have a lot of them. Here\u2019s what I\u2019m going to do. I\u2019m going to think about this telephone device. I might even buy one for the office.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nYou may like it.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nNo, no. I\u2019m too old to be screwing around with fancy technology. But maybe someone here could use it to talk on. They could call up people that don\u2019t buy our products, maybe at dinner time when everyone\u2019s home and tell them when we\u2019re having a sale and that sort of thing. I want you to do something for me Marty. Play around with that one you have and bring me a report. I\u2019d like to see some documented evidence that this sort of thing has a return on investment. I call it ROI. Get it? ROI. It’s an abbreviation for return on investment.<\/p>\n

Marty<\/strong>
\nGood one sir. And thank you for the beer. It really was very light.<\/p>\n

John<\/strong>
\nDamn straight my boy. Some brewery came up with some fancy way to take out a lot of the calories. Just goes to show you son, you can\u2019t put the brakes on innovation.<\/p>\n

THE END<\/h2>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Welcome one and all to the world premiere of the Theater of the Absurd, the…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":45,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5005,9],"tags":[128,5087,2282,3035],"class_list":["post-19585","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-cartoon","category-social-media-marketing","tag-business","tag-innovation-in-the-workplace","tag-social-media","tag-social-media-adoption"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nSocial Media is as Worthless as the Telephone - Social Media Explorer<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Barry Feldman looks at the adoption of social media by executives and contemplates if they felt the same way years ago about using a telephone to communicate with their customers.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/socialmediaexplorer.com\/social-media-marketing\/social-media-is-as-worthless-as-the-telephone\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Social Media is as Worthless as the Telephone - 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